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Hugh Jass productions and MtnTouring.com proudly unveiled the course for the 3rd annual tour de burg this morning in front of a standing room only crowd on the steps of court square. The Tour, the only true mtn stage race in the world, will feature classic traditional routes along with some new changes for the millennium. Most notable of these changes is the traverse of the Great North Mtn, over the Cat. IX Elliot Knob. Increasing to 10 days of racing this year, the tour has truly evolved as the premier test of solid bike riders on the East Coast. Interesting faces in the crowd this morning included Norwegian Chris Scott and Italian Thomas Jenkini. Both stodgy tour veterans curious about the suffering planned for this year's event. When questioned about their participation in the Tour, Jenkini ran off after his stolen truck and Scott mumbled something about a new line of work. Promoter and super domestique Miguel Carpellini was present for the announcement despite suffering numerous deabilitating injuries, already forcing him to miss many of the spring classics. It has been rumored that last year's champion, Paul Bushetti, has taken up residence in the burg and formed a new powerhouse clean team. Will the C-ville contingency continue to represent with an obvious ringer on their squad? Regardless of the gossip of the peloton there will surely be many contenders at this years event but few will commit to such a grueling race course in the heat of summer. Start Times: Due to the large number of participants the promoter will try to stage races early in the morning or late in the day. Mtn stages will be started early when possible to avoid heat. Road stages can be started late in the day pushing start times to 3 pm. Hugh jass hopes to include more riders with a more flexible schedule. Regardless some stages will take the entire day, be prepared. For rules and regulations please contact: Mike carpenmc@jmu.edu

Saturday, July 1 Mtn--SMT North from Town The peloton will roll out early for this stage, a new addition to the tour format. Even if the group makes it to the trail head without getting hit by a car they are in no way out of harms reach. The ensuing singletrack ridge ride will leave many riders fearing for the week to come.

Sunday, July 2 Road--New market to Edinburgh via Massanutten mountain. Another new stage for this year's tour, riders will get a break from their mtn bikes and unveil their road form that inevitably plays an important role for the general classification.

Monday, July 3 Mtn--Massanutten Orange. Dropped as a stage last year, this ridge will make riders prove their technical form. Perhaps the nasty ridge ride in the state of Virginia, look for the dark horse here.

Tuesday, July4th Mtn-- Elliot Knob The real test is today, independence day. Will some brave soldier overcome the heat and the competition to independently dominate the tour??? The steeps, rocks, and magic of Elliot Knob will create a glorious battleground.

Friday, July 7th Road-Sklyine 101 No Tour would be complete without this signature road stage that has proven instrumental in races past.

Sunday, July 9th Mtn-Shenandoah Mtn Trail South Its not over til you jerkemtight and the south sisters sing deep in the heart of Bathe county. No lead is safe with this stage looming in the back of riders minds.

If you are interested in competiting in the 2000 Tour (Team Green vs. Team Clean) all you need to do is send in your letter of intent to the officials along with your European- cycling history.

Dear Kindly Race Promoter: I am checking with zee team La Director Sportif, une 'oping zhat vee due not 'ave any how you say -- Konflicts -- vis any of zee Tour La Femmes in Europe durink zee dates of your stage race. I vill chek vis de otter bionic vomen on my team and lat you know as soon as possible. Carol (zee Barrel) Vaters

Chris, the Norweigian Hitch-hiker, Scott, I'm nervous and twitchy with anxiety. Can't wait to bat clean up and scrape your sorry ass off the road, (or find you sitting there mumbling in trailside stupor) The Russian is coming, the Russian is coming!!! From Russia with love, --Nikolai Danielski

Yo...I've heard there was a press release regarding this year's tour, have you forgotten about your loyal doobiemestique in NOVA? I've been graced with an endowment of skinny tires and am hoping to get in on a few legs of the action.

Ahhh!, You have already fallen into McGowan's trap. While his name may bring to mind images of the relatively flat Irish Republic, this rider actually hails from the Spanish peninsula (first name is pronounced, da VEED, spanish mother, irish father, AKA - the red headed Spaniard!). We all know that no climbers of significance have originated from the green island. However, the same cannot be said of Spain! McGowan likes to lull his rivals into believing that he will be a fixture in the sprinter's gruppetto once a grand tour hits the steep slopes of the Dolomites, Alpes, or Pyranhees. McGowan's physical stature also lulls his adversaries into believing that he will not be a factor in the mountains (weighing in at a rather portly 76 kg., on a 1.9 m. frame). He then pounces upon their laziness and lack of preparation, inflicting immeasurable suffering upon them as he "dances on the pedals" up the mountainside. Despite being a Spaniard, McGowan is quite popular with the tifosi, the Italian fans who mob the sides of the road during the Giro d'Italia. The italian fans have come to embrace McGowan, who is known for reciting inspirational Bible verses as he does his "dance"! European cycling history includes numerous stints during the grand tours and spring classic campaigns with the Spanish Kelme squad. Remarked teamate Fernando Escartin after his podium finish in Paris last year, "Without McGowan encouraging me up to Sestriere with his inspirational words, I never could have made it. He has been a valiant teamate during this years tour, working tirelessly and selflessly to put me on the podium. I vow that next year, I will return the favor and strive to help him earn a stage win in the tour d'Burg." Unfortunately, McGowan has never actually finished a grand tour. He is known for his fear of "vampires" (specifically of the UCI variety). The mere mention of them usually sends McGowan packing back to his home in the Pyranhees for a (mandatory) rest period.